16 Inches!!!

That's how many inches I have lost since April 6th. That is only 5 weeks!!!! Whoooohoooooo!!! I can't believe it. I started taking my inch measurements because I didn't feel I was losing enough weight with my workouts and eating. That is bust, stomach, waist and hips. Although the road ahead may seem endless at times it is important to note that the road behind me wasn't that long for 16 whole inches!!!!

It's incredible how the simple words of someone you may not know well can change your attitude and your day. I awoke today tired and really not ready to go to the gym. After my workout I was talking to a couple of the ladies and one of them looked me in the eye and say "I am so proud of you, you are doing fantastic." Her words meant so much. Often times we forget to tell people the good. Today I am going to make sure I tell someone else I am proud of them or compliment them because it deserves to be said, who knows, they just may need that lift!

Have a good day all!

Burnt Meadow Mountain, Brownfield ME

Well it is 4 months since our first hike on Burnt Meadow Mountain. Wow what a different person I am today compared to January 11, 2009. We hiked to the first peak and valley. Burnt Meadow has 3 peaks. It was a great day for a hike 55 degrees. Nice wind to keep the bugs off. I didn't even cry once (okay I came close.) Molly kept saying Mom isn't going to make this spot it will be to tough for her. I know she is only 6. What it really pointed out to me is that I scared the hell out of my children on that first hike. I am so glad that I have improved my health since then. I still have 140lbs to lose but I will lose it. Just one step at a time, one day at a time, one family hike at a time.

In August when we hike to the 3rd peak for my 38th birthday I will feel the greatest success of my lifetime.

Starting Month 3 at the Gym!

Life is pretty good. I have lost 10lbs in the last couple of months. I have been going to the gym 3-5 days each week and I am getting stronger and healthier!

After that statement who needs anything more?

Loving ME

I have been slowly working on me. I posted yesterday about how I am trying to not be a slug at home. I have been working on the inside also.

Since the beginning of 2009 I have been listening to these podcasts that I am getting a lot out of. It's called Inside Out Weight Loss. They are giving me tools to deal with me and how to improve myself and make the correct choices for my body and my well being. And fix the old hurts. My friends know that I have struggled with my weight nearly all my life. I have wanted to have weight loss surgery for years. For a long time I didn't pursue it, I think because I was afraid of that failing. Now with only catastrophic health insurance it is not an option. My weight struggle/food issues started early for me. I joined weight watchers (with the help of my mother) for the first time when I was just 8 years old. From that time on I felt inadequate, not a good daughter, not a good granddaughter. I remember hearing you would be so beautiful "if only" you would lose the weight. This has been on my mind a tremendous amount since Hannah turned 8 this past year. What went wrong in my childhood that food became my answer? And why is it that if I was sooo overweight that I needed WW at the tender age of 8 - why can Hannah wear the dresses that were made for me at that age and they are only a little loose. This realization has really made me wonder, was my Mothers own demented issues with food projected on me? Could I have been thinner all growing up if they had diverted the attention from the food issue to something else? I have been blessed with 2 beautiful girls that don't have the same issues with food. And I plan on keeping it that way. So I set my intention every day to eat healthy, listen to my body and hear it's needs, and move more - whether it is regimented exercise or just taking a quick walk. I set my intention to love me and allow others to love me because I am beautiful no matter what my weight is, no matter what the world thinks, I AM BEAUTIFUL!!!

I checked my blog today to realize it has been 3 weeks since I blogged last. I don't want to fall into the pattern of before so here goes:

Not much happening. Still juggling 2 jobs, 2 kids and a cranky husband. Hubby has not found work. I don't expect him to any time soon. Especially with every day there is a dismal report about how bad the economy is doing. I have been making a conscious decision to not let it get me too depressed. I can't change it. We currently have unemployment. He is looking so I let it just roll off my back.

I have been making an effort since the beginning of the year to work on me. One of the things I am doing is just trying to be more active in my own home. Not such a slob. I am by no means a dirty person and I am certainly not a neat freak nor do I want to claim to be, I just want to end some of the clutter and feel like it's home not Building 19 or Marden's! In this vein I have cleaned my bedroom gotten rid of clothes that don't fit or I don't wear and just tried to make it feel like a room I want to step into not just a place to sleep. I figure if I do a little of this every day then I can feel good about me as a human being and that I won't be as horrified if someone drops in for a visit. So stop on by and see if I am keeping up the good work!

I've been tagged!

Rachael tagged me in the 6 Photo Meme. The rules are simple.

1.Go to your Picture Folder on your computer or wherever you store your pictures.
2.Go to the 6th Folder, then pick the 6th picture in that folder.
3.Post that picture on your blog and the story that goes along with the picture.
4.Tag 6 other peoples that you know or don’t know to do the same thing and leave a comment on their blog or an e-mail letting them know you chose them.

So here is my photo. Molly at 3 years old opening presents on Christmas Morning 2005. What a goofy smile 3 year olds have! We lived in what Molly affectionately refers to the 'partment. She still wants to live there because the bathroom was off of her bedroom and she didn't have to go far to get to the toilet in the night.

Ok so I don't know who to tag I will tag Sherri, Lesley, Pam, Melissa (who won't play) and I feel kinda creepy adding people I don't know. So I will hang at 4.

Hair

I was thinking the other day when my mother said to someone "Jennifer used to be adventerous with her hair but not anymore" Why is that? I did. I cut it funky all the time. I colored it funky all the time. Hec I even shaved "90" in the back of my head for highschool graduation and then outlined it in red lipstick. I even cut it a few years ago to a few really fun cuts. So why now do I do longer do anything adventerous with my hair.

It's simple really, I moved to Maine and gained 40lbs (which I have lost some of that) and I don't want to draw attention to myself. I feel awkward, ugly and like I don't fit in already so I don't want to draw attention to me the outcast. It took me forever to make a few friends here in Maine. Maybe what I need to do to get over that is go have a couple of hot pink stipes put in my hair - what do you think?